


Roxanne

by Sidonie



Category: Song of the Lioness - Tamora Pierce
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Crack, Drag Queen, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-06-16
Updated: 2011-06-16
Packaged: 2017-10-20 11:59:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/212552
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Sidonie/pseuds/Sidonie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Jon and Alanna decide to go out on the town, and of course Gary gets dragged along. He soon finds that clubbing is more interesting than he'd thought.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Roxanne

**Author's Note:**

> PURE CRACK. Modern AU, my first, actually. I blame the lovely museicality, who created the plotbunny, and all the other Glakers who nurtured it. Written for Goldenlake's most excellent SMACKDOWN competition.

Colored spotlights flashed across a darkened stage as the crowd hooted and hollered and wolf-whistled. Music pounded, too loud for Gary, who was seated in a booth in the corner, squinting at the paperwork he'd brought. Across from him, Alanna—dressed as a man for the occasion—shouted something in Jon's ear.

"Oh, you work too much, don't be such a stick in the mud," Gary mumbled, voice mocking. "Come with us, it'll be fun! If this is their idea of fun—"

"Did you say something?" Alanna called.

He flashed her his best smile. "No. Just trying to get some work done."

"Oh, honey, this is a club, not a cubicle." The unfamiliar voice was low and smoky, dripping with a thick, seductive Southern drawl. Gary looked up . . . and up. The newcomer towered over him, easily over six feet even without the cherry-red high heels. Impossibly long legs stretched up to a short, red-sequined dress which glittered in the low light. Matching scarlet lipstick highlighted a lush mouth, now stretched in a mischievous grin, bright against a tumble of ebon curls and sloe-black eyes.

Propping hands on hips, the stranger batted luxurious eyelashes at him. "Like what you see, darling?"

Gary swallowed hard. He barely even registered Jon and Alanna's chuckling, because the man—or was the correct term woman?—was now sliding an arm around his shoulders, strong fingers toying with his hair. Before he could remember how to speak, he had a large, decidedly flirtatious drag queen in his lap.

"Around here, I go by Roxanne, but honey, for you I'm Roxie." Catching sight of Jon, who was helpless with laughter on the other side of the table, Roxie fluttered her fingers in a coy wave. "Oh hey there! I remember you. Francis told me _all_ the details." She gave a broad wink, and Jon choked on a sip of his margarita, flushing magenta as he coughed. Alanna collapsed in another fit of hysterical giggles.

Finally regaining some semblance of coherency, Gary cleared his throat. "Um, hello." He winced at his own ineptness, but forged ahead. "I'm Gareth Naxen. Uh, Gary. People call me Gary."

He received an inviting smile for his efforts. "Well, if you ask for me after the show, hon, you can call me anything you want. But outside this place, I'm Raoul. And I'm _so_ pleased to meet you."

Gary took a deep breath. "Pleased to meet you too." Much to his surprise, it was the truth.

Maybe drag clubs could be fun after all.


End file.
